


Drunk Words Are Sober Thoughts

by grimeysociety



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Drunken Confessions, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff and Smut, Friends With Benefits, Let Steve Fuck, Mutual Pining, Secret Relationship, ShieldShock - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-01
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-06 20:00:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,892
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26224576
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grimeysociety/pseuds/grimeysociety
Summary: During Pepper's bachelorette party in Vegas, Darcy sends Steve a video, a drunken love confession.
Relationships: Darcy Lewis/Steve Rogers
Comments: 51
Kudos: 430





	Drunk Words Are Sober Thoughts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Em_Jaye](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Em_Jaye/gifts).



> Happy Birthday to the beautiful and brilliant Em_Jaye. I love youuuuuuuuuuuu 😘 Your friendship means the world to me, and I'm so lucky to have you. 
> 
> (Thank you also for giving the line "I know you think I don’t mean this, but drunk words are sober thoughts, alright?". The early 2000s were not the best. Oof.)

Darcy woke face-down in her pillow, the spear of her headache greeting her with the afternoon sun coming through the open window.

She lifted her head, squinting around, realizing she wasn’t wearing any clothes except for a pair of black boyleg underwear. Her hair was a nest on her head, and she didn’t want to think about what had happened to all the makeup she put on last night. She turned over, forcing herself to sit up a little, reaching for her phone on her bedside table.

Her display confirmed what she already suspected – she’d slept through a whole day, and it was close to 4PM. Vegas had not been kind to her, at least not last night. Darcy knew she started off well, wearing a red t-shirt that read _KEEP UP_ on the front in white text, and for the most part, she had. She was drinking steadily and happily, taking lots of photos on her phone…

It was Pepper’s bachelorette party weekend. Darcy was surprised she was invited, only to remind herself she did in fact see Pepper every day at work and it wasn’t as if she’d got on her nerves. There were some photos of them together, then some blurry footage of the bride-to-be at the _Magic Mike_ show getting all types of attention from two dancers, Jane’s drunken cackle the main soundtrack, Darcy’s best friend somewhere off-screen.

Some of the footage she didn’t remember recording, such as Pepper declaring:

_“There’s alcohol in this but I can’t taste it… so goodbye!”_

They got bottle service at a club, they danced and did shots at another. It was hard to know when things really spun out of control, because Darcy could remember they began the second they landed in Nevada, drinking champagne in the limo ride over to the hotel.

When did they get a karaoke machine out? Darcy frowned at some of the texts she’d got from Jane, accompanied with footage of Darcy’s garbled rendition of The Cars’ _Just What I Needed_. Darcy could only cringe so much – everyone looked like they were completely blitzed, gracious Pepper included.

She went back to the rest of her texts, seeing she’d sent a couple to Steve, along with a video. She felt her stomach backflip as always, thinking of him. That started recently, the tummy thing, but their friendship being more physical had started a few months ago, the night of Tony and Pepper’s engagement.

Darcy didn’t talk about it, not even with Jane. She knew what that would entail. They really were just good friends, and Darcy’s body betraying her by lighting up every time she thought about him was something she’d rather would go away. She didn’t think it was embarrassing, per se – anyone would have a crush on Steve. It was _Steve_.

He was the one who gasped every time he pushed inside her like it was the first time, his lips anywhere he could reach her skin. He always had a shirt for her to wear when she asked to stay over. He always had condoms and never bitched about it, and Darcy reaped the benefits when she told him she was on the pill and STD-free, three weeks into them fucking every couple days.

Darcy realized her standards for a decent man in the 21st century were pretty low, but she wasn’t after a relationship. She loved Steve very much, but they were friends. Friends that went down on each other and hadn’t told their other friends about it.

She saw she’d sent him a video, but she skipped it for now to try to decipher the texts she’d sent him in the night. Steve, ever the good sport, had tried to reply to them all as best he could.

Some of her messages were just emojis and random letters, like she’d fallen asleep on her phone. She wouldn’t put it past her drunk self to do that. She went back to the video and hit play, wondering what the fuck she’d thought was so important to send to him.

_“Listen… listen… I know, I know I’ve had like…”_

Darcy was horrified by what she saw. Her drunk version of herself couldn’t seem to focus on anything properly when she stared down at her phone, recording herself on the front facing camera. Her hair was half out of her ponytail, her face sweaty, and mascara under her hazy eyes. Her free hand was up, her eyes falling to her fingers, attempting to count.

_“Like, seven drinks? Seven… teen? But I love you, Steve.”_

“Oh, you fucking idiot,” Darcy groaned to herself now, closing her eyes.

_“I’m in love with you, but I don’t want to tell you. And don’t listen to sober me, this is the truth.”_

“Jesus, take a pause, Darcy,” she whispered, her guts churning. “Dumb, drunk bitch…”

_“Because I know – I know you think I don’t mean this, but drunk words are sober thoughts, alright?”_

She grimaced as drunk Darcy puckered her lips in a clumsy kiss before the video stopped, but not until she dropped her phone with several loud _thunks_ and hissed curse words.

Darcy passed a hand over her face, seeing that Steve had received the video but hadn’t replied to the message. It had been sitting there for more than twelve hours, unacknowledged.

She put her phone back down, drawing her knees up to hug them, groaning to herself. She felt like shit, her head pounding as her anxiety spurred on her nausea rising in her stomach, and she felt like she couldn’t move too fast or she’d topple over and not get back up again.

And then, embarrassingly, under all the physical woes, she felt tears begin to form and threaten to spill over as she buried her face in her knees.

She was in love with Steve. That wasn’t a lie. He didn’t need to know about any of that, at all.

She could recall the night of the engagement party so well since it was their first time, and he’d been standing at a little table with Sam, drinking as the crowd sang and danced along to the music in the massive hall rented in Manhattan. Darcy was with Jane and a couple interns at their own table, standing on the other side of the dancers, all that space between them, and their eyes had still locked and he’d smiled at her like he always did, and she’d smiled back.

Their first kiss was in an elevator up to his room hours later, and their first fuck was urgent and rushed, but they spent the rest of the weekend in bed.

-

For the rest of the weekend, Darcy knew she was in a funk because of the confession she’d sent Steve. She tried her best to perk up for the sake of the party, to not let anyone know too much of what she didn’t want to share. She was lucky that Pepper took it as her hangover being especially gnarly.

She arrived back at the Tower with the intention of running a bath and turning in early.

She heard a knocking on her door when she was lying on the couch, remote in hand, trying to wind down and not think about what her week would be like. She felt her stomach flip, sitting up.

He hadn’t texted her in more than a day, but she knew it was him. No-one else knocked like that, three in a row without calling out to her.

She considered pretending to be asleep, but she knew the longer she took to pluck up the courage to face him, the worse she would feel. Hating herself a little for doing the right thing, she stood from the couch, drawing in a breath as she made her way to the front door.

As she opened it, she felt herself flush at the sight of him. She swallowed.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he echoed, and he looked his usual adorable self, wearing his weekend clothes of navy pants and a gray t-shirt. “Heard you got back.”

“Yeah,” she replied, folding her arms over her chest.

There was a beat and Steve’s lips curled ever so slightly, nearly undetectable.

“Can I… come in?”

“Yeah, yeah,” Darcy breathed, stepping aside to let him through, her eyes ducking.

It hadn’t been like this before, so that was a bad sign. She hadn’t wanted anything to ever change between them, and because of this weekend, they were going into this weird territory Darcy never flourished in to begin with. She hated that she’d dragged Steve there along with her.

He seemed less bothered, though, walking through to sit on the couch. Darcy hovered, hesitating.

“You want a drink?” she asked, and he shook his head.

She thought about getting something for herself, but she hesitated, biting her lip. Steve put up a hand to beckon her.

“Darce, sit down.”

“I’m… I’m scared to,” she admitted, a nervous titter escaping. “Uh. Yeah…”

Their eyes locked and she conceded with a little sigh, sitting beside him, their knees bumping. Her couch wasn’t built to share with men of Steve’s size.

“Can we just move past the godawful crap I sent you?” she blurted, before putting her face in her hands. “The hangover afterwards was punishment enough. I don’t wanna deal with the rest…”

“Okay,” Steve said, but he sounded like he was humoring her.

Darcy gave a little groan, rubbing her eyes. She took her hands away, shooting him a glance. He was giving her a little smile, a hint of something indistinguishable on his face, and Darcy shook her head.

“I’m sorry. It would’ve been so weird, and… confusing,” she murmured. “If you want us to not… fuck around anymore, I’d understand –”

“Darce,” Steve cut in, and Darcy went still, as he shifted closer to her, a hand coming down to squeeze her knee. “It’s _okay_.”

Darcy winced. “God, you’re so sweet even when you’re breaking it to me _gently_.”

Steve chuckled, a little breath of a laugh. His forehead pressed into hers.

“I’m not gonna lie, I am enjoying you squirm a little bit,” he said, and Darcy scoffed.

“Never mind what I said about sweetness, then,” she mumbled, but she was grateful that some of the tension was cut.

He pressed a kiss to her nose, and Darcy felt herself smile.

“Let’s just forget about it, okay?” she whispered.

He gave her a second kiss, cupping her jaw, slanting his mouth over hers, his intention clear. All was forgiven, and he wasn’t going to push her away. The relief Darcy felt made her loosen, her hands on his wrists as he kissed her again and again…

When he finally drew back for her to breathe, with a little peck to her lips, their eyes met.

“Do you wanna stay at mine tonight?”

She thought about it for maybe a second, how she’d need to drag herself down here again in the morning to get ready before joining Jane in the labs, and she nodded.

“Sure. I know you hate my tiny bed –”

Steve was staring back her in a way that made her stop talking, his eyes scanning her face, his hands on either side of her face.

“Do you want to stay?”

“Yes,” Darcy said, feeling her cheeks burn.

“Forever?” he said, and she felt her stomach flip, staring back at him.

She didn’t say anything, trying to think of how she was being tricked, by either her own brain or Steve. He didn’t seem the type to take a prank that far, though. He never meant to hurt her.

“What do you mean?”

Did he feel obligated to let this play out until she threw him aside? Because that would never happen, friendship or not. She’d never do that to him.

The silence between them was charged and Darcy didn’t dare speak first, in case the spell broke and he’d slip away from her. Now that she thought about it, she wouldn’t be okay with them not sleeping together anymore. She’d miss him as badly as a painful breakup.

“I was a sap this weekend,” he mumbled, a frown forming. “Sam noticed. Called me… ‘despondent’.”

“Oh,” Darcy murmured, unsure of what else to say.

“I missed you too badly,” he said, eyes on her mouth and then slipping up to her eyes. “And I love you.”

Darcy felt it as if she’d been hit with the emotion straight on her nose, her eyes smarting, and she swallowed hard, Steve’s hands pushing her hair back, a little smile on his face again.

“I’ve never seen you like this before,” she murmured.

“I hadn’t let you,” he murmured back.

“Steve…”

She kissed him hard, her hands slipping up to tug at his hair, his hands falling to her back to pull her closer. It was like he wasn’t close enough, and Darcy couldn’t make herself move fast enough, not thoroughly enough. She’d begun to shake, pulling back to pant for air, their faces still bumping.

“Come upstairs?” he whispered, and she nodded, hands curling in his shirt.

In the elevator, Darcy sucked on his tongue, Steve’s body bracketing her into a corner. Breaking apart, she whispered:

“You sure you weren’t just horny?”

“Can you imagine what that was like?” he retorted, hand slipping down to give her butt a squeeze. “I get a video like that at two in the fuckin’ morning from my girl and I don’t get to see her for two more days?”

He whisked her out of the elevator, pushing her into the wall when they slipped inside his apartment. Steve took her shoes, picked her up and carried her into the bedroom, Darcy’s thighs around his middle, his lips at her throat.

When he lay her down on the mattress, on his knees between her open thighs, he peeled off his shirt without breaking eye contact, the air shifting. Darcy lifted her hips and tugged down her pants, not wanting to wait, pulling him in to lie chest-to-chest for another kiss.

“Pants, pants,” she whispered, and he pulled his down, as Darcy crossed her arms to clumsily yank of her shirt, hands going to her bra to unclasp it a second later.

Steve shuffled down, kissing her stomach, then further, her thigh and knee, his hand moving up to feel between her legs, Darcy’s chest heaving from anticipation.

She hadn’t been this impatient in a while. Steve didn’t seem to want to draw it out much longer, sealing his mouth over her cunt and kissing her there, loving her with his mouth and tongue.

“Oh, wow,” Darcy gasped, unable to stop herself.

He was damn determined to say the least, and she dug her heels into the mattress, her head falling back as he lapped at her, arms wrapped around her thighs.

Darcy’s hand came down to rest her fingers deep in his hair, her hips beginning to lift, rocking against him. Steve groaned, the sound spurring Darcy further on, her eyes falling shut as she felt the world begin to shrink to the space between her thighs –

“Fuck,” she gasped, coming, Steve’s mouth unyielding, the pleasure rolling over her like a perfect wave.

She managed to wriggle away, taking Steve by the shoulders and he sat up, only to have Darcy push him with both hands against his chest, and he flopped onto his back with a smile. Darcy swung a leg over his hips and lined them up, aiming him upward.

As she began her descent, Darcy was rewarded with Steve's little gasp, and then a huff as he bottomed out, the stretch making her face tingle with renewed pleasure.

He shifted, the angle changing, until he was sitting upright, and he cuddled her, Darcy’s hands on his head and neck, his face buried in the crook of her neck, lips brushing her now sweaty skin.

“I wanna stay like this for a little bit,” he whispered, and Darcy couldn’t handle it, Steve being this way with her.

It occurred to her that he always had been, she just hadn’t seen it for what it was. They breathed together for a minute or so, Steve inside her, wrapped around her, Darcy’s mouth pulling into a smile with her eyes misting.

She placed both hands on his head to tilt his face toward hers, their eyes meeting.

“Despondent, huh?” she whispered, and he gave a smile.

“Yeah. Beside myself…”

Darcy began to move and his face flushed, eyes flying shut, and they kissed, languid and messy enough to let her know that he was already close. His hands were on her hips, lifting her up and down, his moans growing louder, his breath turning ragged.

“Let go, Steve,” she whispered. “I’m not going anywhere. I’m staying…”

“I love you,” he whispered, and he moved them again, Darcy falling onto her back, Steve tucking back inside her with his forehead pressed to hers.

He picked up speed, lasting only another minute before he went still, Darcy’s arms and legs locked around him, his massive shoulders giving a roll as he came, face hidden in her hair.

When he pulled back, Darcy touched the side of his face.

“I love you, too.”

He turned his face to kiss her palm, reaching up to rub her inner wrist with his thumb.

**Author's Note:**

> [my Tumblr](http://grimeysociety.tumblr.com/)


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